COVID-19: Cancelled Race / Mock Adjustment

These are certainly unprecedented times we are living in right now.  COVID-19 is certainly wreaking havoc with local, regional, national, and international racing right now.  My heart and prayers go out to everyone impacted by this pandemic. I hope our local race directors and event companies are prepared to weather the storm.  I for one will be more than willing to leave my race registration fees with them to keep them "whole".  The registration fee is simply my party fee for all the training I put in to prepare for the race.

My first race casualty of the year was the B&A Trail Half Marathon in Severna Park, MD.  We learned of the cancellation earlier this week.  Fortunately, a running race is easily replaced with your own run on your own course somewhere.  Therefore as soon as I received the news, I started planning my own mock race on the Torrey C. Brown Rail Trail (aka NCR Trail).

Enter my amazingly dedicated father!  At 77 years old, he is always up for an adventure.  He first suggested that he would love to drive to each of the roads that cross the trail and cheer me on.  That would be four different spots that would require him to drive over 50 miles to accomplish.  But after a few discussions, he decided that he would like to ride alongside me on my old bike.  "Are you sure dad?!"  He said he would ride for as long as he could, stop, rest, and ride again.  Ok... let's see where this goes.

Saturday morning arrived and it was a brisk cool morning, about 42 degrees at 6:00 AM.  I had set up my old mountain bike by lowering the seat and swapping out the pedals so my dad did not have to deal with the old foot straps.  We met at 6:15 AM in my driveway.  As it was still dark, we both made our way to the trail with our head lamps on.  I could tell my dad was nervous about this but he did not say a word.  I commenced with my warm up as I would have and left him there in the dark for a while.  When I returned, he was set and ready to go.  Of course, I wanted a selfie before we started.

The sign behind us captured our plan perfectly.  I would run out in front and he would follow at his own pace.  At about 6:45 AM, at first light (as you can see in the background), "the race" started!  I am not going to go into much detail about my effort, as I met all my goals that would have been before me if the real race had taken place.  I wanted to PR my half marathon and test my mental capacity to handle the "hurt locker" I was prepared to go into in order to achieve it.  This blog is about my memory of spending time with my dad.  This story is the best way to explain the relationship and dedication we have grown to have for each other since I started racing five years ago. 

As I approached the turn around point on the trail, I did begin wondering how dad was doing and if he would be right behind me as I turned around.  Alas, he was not.  In a way, this encouraged me to remain steadfast on my pace and know that I would encounter him soon.  About a mile or so after the turn around, I saw him in the distance.  As I approached and he realized I was coming towards him, he decided to dismount and offer me the water bottle as we had planned.  When I was about 100 yards away, he proceeded to tip over and fall to the ground!  I said, "Oh s#&t, are you ok?"  He quickly said, "Yes!"  He dusted himself off and still offered me a drink!  I said, "Are you sure!?" as I was quickly approaching and preparing to stop if he was not.  He said, "Yes!!" again and in a way that told me not to ask again... his pride might have been hurt.  I totally understood this!

So off I went, marveling in the fact that at the point I saw him he had ridden over five miles and only stopped twice.  Keep in mind, dad told me it may have been over fifteen years since he had ridden a bike!  I pretty much knew by now that he would not be keeping up with me on the way back, but his presence was never forgotten and helped propel me to push harder towards a negative split on the run. 

In the final miles, I was in pure darkness trying to push as hard as I could the whole way home.  I had passed several folks I recognized on the way back with little more than a grunt or even a peace sign.  Though, I had comfort in knowing if dad was in trouble there were many folks available to help.  I soon reached the finish and immediately turned back to walk towards where he would be riding.  It was less than two minutes before I recognized him coming down the trail.

As he approached, I could tell he was suffering.  He was suffering far worse than I was during the final miles of my run.  He glided towards me and I basically caught him and the bike to steady him.  He had ridden the entire way back without stopping once, another five or so miles!  He had stopped one time previously, so this totally pushed him past his comfort zone.  He was shaking like a leaf and said,  'I am alright.. my legs are just numb... my heart rate is fine though!"  Through all of that, he kept the presence of mind to maintain an understanding of how he was feeling.  He could hardly stand on his own and I helped him dismount.  We stood there and I was far more proud of his accomplishment than mine.  His willingness to exhibit his suffering, to accept the help, and to take the time to recover demonstrated so much to me.

We slowly walked back from the trail to my house.  By the time we were halfway, he was feeling fairly well and we just chatted about the experience.  He even helped me stop and fix the kid's bounce back in the yard.  I invited him into the house to warm up, taking the chance that my wife would be upset being seen in her PJ's.  Indeed, everyone was awake in their PJ's in the kitchen.  My dad was so happy, excited, and talkative with the kids.  I could tell he felt so alive!  I was so happy for him!  March 14th is now memorable for three reasons, first it was his mother's birthday, this would have been here 101st.  Second, it is the day I proposed to my wonderful wife.  Third, it is the day that dad and I suffered together and loved every minute of it!

I reflect now that this man is the example of strength, perseverance, stubbornness, adventurous, dedicated, passionate, and craziness that has created me.  His silence is not anger or frustration but of constant deliberation with himself and on subjects that are close to his heart. By learning who my father is, I have learned more about who I am.  I will forever be grateful for this memory and the many we have created together on the road to my races.  I love you dad!  Thank you for all the support!